Say What!
by ObsessiveOtakuChick
Summary: L/Raito Humor Fluff. Based on a Real Life Conversation. Reviews Begged for.


**Okay, I feel like I should get SOMETHING posted tonight, but since the other 8 HALF-FINISHED fanfics on my hard drive aren't coming…I'll write Death Note Fluff to make up for my last couple of angst filled fics…**

**(Based on a real conversation between me and my best friend…written as an apology fic because everyone thinks we're gay already and comments like THIS from me aren't really helping matters.)**

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Raito sighed, and slumped down in his chair…it was the end of yet another long day of staring at files and computer screens with little to no progress. Well, 'End' was a relative term. It was dark, and the other members of the team had gone home or (in Matsuda's case) fallen asleep at the table and had been moved to one of the spare bedrooms. Raito could tell however, just from a glance at his partner, that he had another long sleepless night ahead of him.

Oh well…He had checked all the semi-'Reliable' Kira sights hours ago…now he was just searching sites randomly.

Let's see… _KirasAngelsOnCam?_

He frowned, and quickly scrolled down the page to view the rest of them.

__

Sluts4Kira...

GodFetishes.html

Spankings Of Justice?!

...Good lord, the internet was full of perverts…speaking of which, he glanced over at…an empty chair?

He jumped when he realized that L was hovering over his shoulder…smirking?

"Yagami-kun seems to have _interesting _taste in websites… Perhaps this is what is affecting his performance, more than the lack of sleep as he claims."

Raito closed his eyes, fighting off the encroaching blush on his cheeks and waiting for the inevitable statistic rise…

"19 Percent." L retreated back to his chair.

Even though he had been expecting it, something inside Raito snapped…maybe it was the stress, the embarrassment or the continuous sleep deprivation, but he snarled out:

"You know, maybe my performance would be better if you said something _nice _to me once in a while instead of just criticizing and throwing incriminating statistics at me all day and night!"

Instantly he regretted it. He had been trying, the ONE thing he had been trying to do was not to lash out at L. It was probably up to 25 percent or something now.

When he didn't hear anything, he opened his eyes, and ended up staring at L, one leg off his chair as if he had been interrupted in the process of climbing on, staring blankly at Raito.

After a few seconds of empty looks on both sides, he turned back to his computer, fixing his sitting position without saying a word.

Raito internally breathed a sigh of relief. Apparently he had caught the detective off guard, and hadn't suffered for his actions. Maybe there actually was something to that '40 IQ drop' L was always on about…But he couldn't take a chance like that again. Who knew what would happen?

He turned back to his monitor, quickly replacing the porn sites with victim profiles, intent on immersing himself in work.

For the next ten minutes there was silence, aside from the clicking of the keyboards. L was the first to break the silence.

"I believe that if Yagami-kun were a female he would have an aesthetically pleasing rear end."

For a minute there was pure silence as Raito attempted to assimilate this statement.

"SAY WHAT?!"

L looked over calmly. "Yagami-kun suggested I say something '_nice_', did he not?"

Raito sputtered for a moment.

"Nice?! Nice is…Is…'Good Job'…or…or…I don't know...'I don't think you're Kira,' would be nice!"

L turned to face the bright red teen.

"Was I wrong?"

"YES! You don't tell another man he has a nice ass as a casual compliment!!"

"Ah. But I compensated for Yagami-kun's homophobia by suggesting it would be pleasing if he were _female. _And therefore the gender issue ceases to exist."

"No, No it doesn't!! And that's not the point!! I'm not homophobic!! …Wait, are you insinuating I'd only have a nice butt _if _I was female? Never mind, I don't want to know the answer!! Why do you have to compliment my butt! Why couldn't you say something about my mind?!"

"Apparently, any mention of Yagami-kun's intellect leads to discussion of its parallelism to my own, and therefore, his likelihood of being Kira. I did not think that would be a compliment."

"Well…yeah…but still!!"

"Perhaps it would be best if we abandoned this line of discussion?"

"YES!"

Both men resumed their work.

"But, …um…Thank You?"

"You're welcome, Yagami-kun."

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**Hmmm…I think the actual conversation might have been funnier…oh well…not my best. Reviews help me finish my GOOD stuff faster!**


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